This morning, I had a refrigerator full of fresh fruits and vegetables, a couple different types of that V8 Splash, some of that great Kashi Cinnamon Harvest cereal, and whole wheat bread, just waiting to be made into toast and covered in one of two flavors of all–natural strawberry or blackberry jelly.
For breakfast I had a cup of 20 Oreos covered in milk.
I don’t know how I’ve survived to be this old.
You make the call: reenactor or hard core homeschooler?
It’s this or YouTube videos, people. And I don’t need to remind you what a scary thing that can be? Trust me, you don’t want that.
Or McCain. Whatever.
What I want to know is, aren’t these backwards?
Not much, actually.
This does beg the question, though: which bank is the safest right now? The Bank of Folgers (what with the all–aluminum security features, impervious to squirrels) or First National of Maxwell House (what with the weatherproof security that only plastic can provide). Call me old–fashioned, but I think I’m going with Chock Full o’ Nuts.
“Chock Full of Nuts”? They should call it “Chock Full o’My Investment Portfolio”!
Just a heads up. You know, in case the entire site catches on fire, or it looks like some of the page have holes where I just needed to punch something. Or, you don’t hear from me for 17 months.
Here’s a clue to what’s going on:
You know we got these presidential debates coming on (maybe?). I, for one, am interested in whatever’s on any other station at that time. Maybe that’s just me, but I feel I speak for a large number of Americans when I say there needs to be something added to attain our interest:
Bipartisan velociraptors.
Otherwise, it’s just a bunch of politicians saying the same thing they say all the rest of the time, right?
Hockey Moms Against Sarah Palin
All right, I’m back to not caring about this election any more.
It’s like Team Obama was just trying to tick off Red State Update (and it worked):
And yes, Joe Biden. He’s the VP for the Democrats. I figure you didn’t know that.
FireMillen.com Members and Staff Rejoice over the Firing of Detroit Lions’ President Matt Millen
September 24, 2008 (Detroit, MI) – After 83 losses, countless blown draft picks, and having the Detroit Lions become the laughing stock of the NFL during the last eight years, Detroit Lion’s owner William Clay Ford finally fired President and General Manager Matt Millen.
“Matt Millen should have been fired three years ago after mismanaging the team for his first five years,” says FireMillen.com founder Michael McCune. “At the same time, FireMillen.com members and staff are ecstatic about the decision to finally get rid of the worst general manager in professional sports history.”
Millen’s mismanagement of the team has gotten to the Lions off to another dismal 0-3 start in 2008. Under Millen’s tenure, he has hired three head coaches, even more assistants and coordinators, and signed and drafted new players each year. Even with all of those changes, the Lions are a league worst 31-82. Only the Tampa Bay Buccaneers of the mid 1980’s had a worse record in modern NFL History. In Millen’s tenure, the defense has been one of the worst in the league and the offense has only been ranked in the top half of the league once (2007).
“Poor drafting is just the start of Millen’s failure” said McCune. “He has overpaid free agents that have been backups on other teams and continued to keep players that have not delivered in the past. His mistakes continue to cost this team which has over $15 Million in salary cap space dedicated to players who are no longer on this team.”
While FireMillen.com is no longer needed to promote the firing of Matt Millen, the site will remain up, under a new yet –to-be-determined name, to follow the search process for a new general manager and future seasons.
“We hope that the Lions take this opportunity to execute an exhaustive search for a qualified general manager who can build a team of which Detroit Lions' fans can be proud” McCune continued.
FireMillen.com has always been proud to in keeping its arguments fact based. McCune said “I have no personal problems with Matt Millen. From what I have read, Matt Millen is a nice man and was a great football player. He just was an extremely bad general manager.”
FireMillen.com is not affiliated with the Detroit Lions or the National Football Association. The site was started in 2005 in an effort to get Matt Millen fired. The site has received over a million “hits” since it started and has a dedicated group of readers and forum contributors. For further information or comment, please contact Mike McCune at mmccune@hotmail.com.
Even more: Celebrating the End Of The Millen-ium
Just a minute ago, I was thinking about Sarah Palin’s gaffe over the Bush Doctrine. I was thinking about it, because I couldn’t tell you what the Bush Doctrine was. And I was part of it (got the Bronze Star Medal to prove it).
Seeing her answer again just shows me what I was thinking: she was describing the Bush Doctrine. And so was Charlie Gibson. The non–gotcha comes because they weren’t describing the same Bush Doctrine.
As Joshua Treviño points out, there have been at least ten versions of the Bush Doctrine floating about. And that’s just the ones that haven’t been diluted through the AP. So, while it may look like Gotcha Time!™, it ain’t.
Glenn Beck can say he interviewed her back when. This is back from June, shilling like good little stooges discussing their talking points from their overlords in Big Oil™ sound energy policies.
And yes, like anything involving Alaska, they talk about Drilling ANWR:
Somehow, the wanton murder of thousands of moose didn’t get in the interview. You know why that is. BIAS. This interview reeks of the filth of moose hunting advocates.
Just once — once — I would love to see her pressed on this issue. But know, softball question after softball. Moose lovers demand answers! US out of Alaska! Now!
Like the question about the VeeP? I remember the whole vetting process, and summarily dismisser her because — because there wasn’t anything I could find that I hated about her. She was perfect, thus unelectable.
I’m glad I was wrong.
I know you’re wondering why I keep posting these things from MoreCowbell.dj. IT’S BECAUSE I LOVE ME SOME COWBELL! And because I’m hopelessly geeky.
Like a child on Christmas morning, I found this last night, and almost cried. I cannot describe the pleasure upon the blending of these two things.
| Make your own at MoreCowbell.dj | ||
For those of you who don’t know, there’s a game called ‘Guitar Hero III’ that forces you to spend hours in front of your television slapping five buttons and acting like you can play a musical instrument. And it’s making brazillions of dollars. The kids, they love the fake guitar playing.
This particular song is ridiculously hard, and it’s supposed to be the most difficult song in the game to beat. The top boss level, if you will. Just by completing this on ‘Expert’ will garner you the respect of your peers, and the devotion of your fans.
Behold!
For those non–fake–ax–wielding mortals (like me), perhaps another game would be more appropriate. Perhaps, one with another instrument…
Okay, don’t ask why, but I was using Google image search for Cheerios. This was the second time in the past couple of weeks, so I really have no idea what got into my head. I guess I just wanted to see what would happen.
Only, for reasons that are even less logical than using Google Image Search (GIS) for Cheerios, I turned the Moderate SafeSearch off. Yes, I was searching for Cheerios without expressly forbidding explicit images.
I have no idea why I did this. None.
You know when it’s late, and you’re convincing yourself it’s time for bed? And then you say, “well, one more site—then bed.” 7 hours later you’re wondering if the 1 hour of sleep you’re getting tonight’s gonna cut it? That is the best explanation I can come up with. Look people, I’m posting a story about an image search, you gotta believe me when I say this is outside my normal blogging behavior.
Still doesn’t explain me and my browser window full of Cheerios boxes. A browser window full of explicit Cheerios boxes. At least, that was what might have happened.
No sooner did I start going through the images, that I realized the potential for — well — Cheerios–related internet filth. Look, I’m not going to judge anybody for what gets their boats all floaty, but I wasn’t really thinking. I may have absolutely no idea what my boredom–induced journey into uncensored Cheerios pics, but I most certainly was not searching for anything approaching adult content.
“It’s Cheerios,” I said to myself. “What could happen?”
This happened. I hate the internet, sometimes.
For you completists, here’s the search (potentially NSFW).
Hate to sound repetitive, but somebody just posted a whole lot of awesome over at MoreCowbell.dj. Within the last hour we got all this:
These great hits of the 80s and 90s only available for a limited time! Download now!
Just in time for sock puppet season, I’ve greatly improved the look and feel of the comment threads. It will also make it easier to tell whom is replying to whom with the nifty new ‘@commentername’. That will link to the thing the replier replied to.
It’s all done for you when you click the reply link next to the comment name. Here’s an example of what it would look like if I had commenters (sock puppets I got):
There you are, the finest, most powerful comment system in the free world.
Ah, school choice. The only choice we’re not allowed to have.
[Via]
In the fine tradition of never–making–his–mind–ism, Larry has gone to using this “Old, , Old Guy” thing. What the casual reader will miss is that this is a play on something that happened years ago. Thought I’d bring those of you who forgot and those who just wondered what it was all about.
On the long–abandoned MacStansbury.org I put in a bunch of guest authors. Think of it as my first attempt at being a community organizer. Took a few of my dearest allies and chunked logins at ’em. Then, I made the mistake of giving them titles.
One such title was granted to our very own Larry. The title of “Old, Really Smart, Old Guy.” In retrospect, VP of Operations or COO would’ve been the wiser thing to do. But I went with the patronizing, and there you have it.
In his own deference to my titling, he just took out the good part.
And have I mentioned, he’s old?
Now, you too can get more cowbell. Upload a song, add some cowbell (or Bruce Dickenson, yes, the Bruce Dickenson), and really feel the studio space:
| Make your own at MoreCowbell.dj | ||
I didn’t upload this song, but, hey, come on, it has more cowbell!
Remember this thing?
Two predictions about the presidential race.
Prediction #1: As soon as Barak Obama announces his running mate, his polling numbers will take a dive.
Prediction #2: As soon as John McCain announces his running mate, his polling numbers will go up.
And yeah, I was right. Doesn’t mean much, but the numbers, they have a changed.
Presented without comment, search engine keywords for this site in the past three days. Initial instances of keywords linked to their respective stories.
palindrone (pæl?ndro?m)
noun
ORIGIN early 21th cent.: neologism derived from the word ‘palindrome’ from Greek palindromos ‘running back again,’ from palin ‘again’ + drom- (from dramein ‘to run’ ).
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
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Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
oh, please, oh, please, oh, please, let this thing work
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
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Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton Palin=Eagleton
Yeah, I know I’ve totally quit Obama–bashing long enough to be a total shill for Sarah Palin. Don’t expect that to change any time soon. I’ve got a fever, and the prescription is more moosebell!
And speaking of the music at the end of the Republican convention (he transitioned perfectly), Scandal!:
The Wilson sisters sent a cease and desist to McCain/Palin because they used "Barracuda" by Heart at the end of the RNC. It makes sense: For a rock musician, affiliation with a Republican campaign could be a career-ender. Whoops, too late!
Image from Rachel Lucas. Other stuff from Jim Treacher may also amuse.
Finally, evidence of what we all knew was going to happen, Thank goodness somebody on the internets figured out that there was a scandal there, even if it took a creative writing class to get it working.
So saith The Jawa Report:
There is solid evidence that Sarah Palin may have been fully naked (aka nude) at certain times during her term as Governor, may have worn scandalous lingerie at other points, and may have even engaged in wild sex acts in private that would be positively scandalous in public. Although the full details are still unavailable, it's come to light that Sarah Palin repeatedly exploited a blue-collar Eskimo worker for her own private amusement in the bedroom, and that she had sex with him on at least four separate occasions. It's also well-known in Alaska that Sarah Palin got pregnant by a young snowmobile racer [see photos at The Jawa Report]. (The snowmobiler openly admits he is the father of Palin's child. Palin claims her husband "Todd" is the father.)
Scandal!
I am so not voting for these guys.
Cameras too shaky. Won’t answer tough questions. Probably all Cylons.
And they say good parody is dead…
The people–over–40 vote has just officially been decided. And the mommy vote. And the grandparent vote. Although I think the deadbeat dad vote is still in play.
Nine seconds of video that touches even me, in the dark, bitter lump of coal where my heart should be.
ADDED: 37,244,000 watched Palin (about 1.1 million people less than Obama).
ADDEDER: Over 40 million (using PBS’ fuzzy math)
ALSO: Ahem...Sarah Palin (pause for applause)
I figured you’d want to share in the horror that was contemporary culture, circa 1990.
And feel free to add your own. Share the hate, people. Share the hate.
Ariana H., celebrity caterer, Beverly Hills, CA:
"Disgusting and hypocritical. Thank God my gay ex-husband has hired a staff of nannies to teach responsible sexuality to our children, whats-their-names."
Maureen D., aging loveless spinster, New York, NY:
"Why do these young white trash sluts end up with all the babies, while needy middle-aged urban career women are stuck with shriveled uteruses? If she really cared about that baby she would give it up for adoption. Instead of hockey and bear hunting, it needs to learn about Sex in the City and Manolo Blahnik."
Larry M., moose, Kechikan, AK:
"I just hope this scandal doesn't cause Governor Palin to return to Alaska. Hang in there Sarah! We need you out on the campaign trail, far far away."
Plus a lot more non–cherry–picked quotes from the guy I was gonna vote for.
You know…I've been watching the debates rage on conservative and liberals blogs, television news programs, and print op-ed pages for four days about their resumes, their values, and their suitability to be on a national ticket with so little experience, and now more than ever, I'm firmly convinced that Palin vs. Obama is shaping up to be one hell of a Vice Presidential debate.
More related jibber–jabber:
If this doesn’t prove Team Obama is scared, look at this: the comparison of Obama as presidential candidate versus the former job of the VeeP candidate. That’s right, the latest great move by the Obama camp is to ignore her current job and try and make his current job sound important:
COOPER: And, Senator Obama, my final question — your — some of your Republican critics have said you don't have the experience to handle a situation like this. They in fact have said that Governor Palin has more executive experience, as mayor of a small town and as governor of a big state of Alaska. What's your response?
OBAMA: Well, you know, my understanding is, is that Governor Palin's town of Wasilla has, I think, 50 employees. We have got 2,500 in this campaign. I think their budget is maybe $12 million a year. You know, we have a budget of about three times that just for the month.
So, I think that our ability to manage large systems and to execute, I think, has been made clear over the last couple of years. And, certainly, in terms of the legislation that I passed just dealing with this issue post-Katrina of how we handle emergency management, the fact that many of my recommendations were adopted and are being put in place as we speak, I think, indicates the degree to which we can provide the kinds of support and good service that the American people expect.
Uh, she’s the Governor of Alaska. With a multi–billion dollar budget and tanks and helicopters and stuff. In a non–contiguous state less than an hour away from Russia, not one of our best buddies in the world.
And, again, she isn’t running for the presidency. John McCain is. It’s just amazing to see the comparisons of two people who are should be incomparable.
[Via Ed, from whom all stories flow]
I keep hearing this trope (that’s my word of the day!) about ‘Global Leadership.’ That is, to say, that the United States needs to be more diplomatic, rather than using force. This is a welcomed idea from — you guessed it — our enemies. And, you know, the countries that don’t have as much as we do.
Yet, when there’s a tsunami, earthquake, or other natural disaster, who’s always out there with an open hand? The same people who seem to curse us for our strength. Coincidentally, these are also the same nations who come crying to us when the big bads take their things. When your country gets invaded, you don’t want diplomats — you want killers.
Protection comes from tanks, not words. Strongly phrased statements don’t quell the sounds of suffering. A bowl of rice will do what no speech can ever do. I would gladly use my tanks to ensure the hungry are fed and the people are safe, rather than use my jets to codify world leaders.
Quite frankly, I don’t care what other countries think about this country. The United States is the greatest nation on the earth, and by a fair margin. Success will breed the detractors some seem to be stubbornly courting. If you don’t have somebody hating you, then they just don’t know you exist.
One of the first things I have to teach young leaders is this: their leadership creates enemies. Anyone willing to take a stand for something will, by human nature, create enemies willing to stand against them. I can assure you, we will never reach a full consensus in this lifetime, Being a leader means taking risks, doing what you think is right, even if it means going against what others say is right.
Since seeing this video (thx, Ed) we’ve gotten knee–deep in the ‘Sarah Palin is not experienced enough’ trope. So much so, that now there’s a pool on when she’ll drop out. But beyond the vapid, amorphous arguments that are the basis of the hypothesis that she will excuse herself comes this inevitable conclusion: the presidential race is now—at least in part—about Palin vs. Obama.
And that contest horrifies some people. As Bob Owens points out…
We now know far more about Sarah Palin in just four days than we've learned about Barack Obama in 17 months. That is just sad. It's a pathetic reflection of the mainstream media's unwillingness to do their jobs for fear of finding stories that would hurt the candidate so many of them openly desire to win.
But periodically appearing to read teleprompters isn't vetting, not matter how many months a candidate has done it, and Obama's ability to perform in set-piece debates is both dubious—Hillary once famously took him apart—and irrelevant. Barack Obama really has never been fully vetted. He hasn't even come close.
You want examples?
Four days of vetting has produced more ink about the VPette’s daughter than the former community organizer’s ties to an American terrorist who bombed the White House. Just sad, really. And telling.
I mentioned that some people were horrified by the Palin pick. That’s because she stands for, in a real way, everything that Obama says he is for, but isn’t. And there are people that realize this — an they’re panicking.
First, there’s the whole Brett Favre thing, now there’s the VP snub.
Have I mentioned I am loving this political AND football season more and more?
Tips: / send me money
