[MacStansbury] » barak obama

Ponying the post office

Mac — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 21:45:17 +0000

This would be funny if it wasn’t so serious.

“U.P.S. and FedEx are doing just fine. It’s the post office that’s always having problems.”

This, coming from the greatest orator of out time. He’s trying to show how private insurance companies are doing such a terrible job by showing how terrible every government industry does in comparison to government–run services.

You know what would be awesome? If FexEx got to deliver this package I’ve been waiting on for five days. Oh wait, they are. They just have to give it back to the USPS so that they can deliver it. FedEx makes a ton of money by delivering things for the US government because of how inefficient the government runs the post office.

We are so in for it with this thing.

barak obama, freedom, healthcare, socialism, video, youtube

Less talk, more obeying

Mac — Fri, 07 Aug 2009 18:19:32 +0000

Wow. Just wow.

“But I don’t want the folks who created the mess to do a lot of talking. I want them to get out of the way so we can clean up the mess. I don’t mind cleaning up after them, but don’t do a lot of talking.”

Wow.

barak obama, censorship, freedom, healthcare, socialism, video, youtube

Obama Birth Documents: Forged

Mac — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 17:00:42 +0000

I opened Microsoft Word, set the font to Microsoft’s Times New Roman, then changed it to Times, then changed it back, then typed the rest of the document purportedly from the personal records of the late surgeon Jerry B. Killian.

And my Microsoft Word version, typed in 2009, is an exact match for the documents trumpeted by Robb Allen as “authentic.”

A screenshot of the “original” document as found at Sharp as a Marble:

A screenshot of my Microsoft Word document:

The spacing is not just similar—it is identical in every respect. Notice that the date lines up perfectly (well, come on, it’s a little crooked, give me a break), all the line breaks are in the same places, all letters line up with the same letters above and below, and the kerning is exactly the same. And I did not change a single thing from Word’s defaults; margins, type size, tab stops, etc. are all using the default settings. The one difference (the red squiggly lines under the misspelled words) is probably due to a slight difference between the Mac and PC versions of the Times New Roman font, or it could be an artifact of whatever process was used to artificially “age” the document (or could be because I forgot to turn off spell–checking).

There is absolutely no way that this document was typed on any machine that was available in 19–whenever–Obama–was–born.

UPDATE: You know what would really make this post sing? Animation!

UPDATE: Not singy enough. Still needs something. Hmm.

I know!

SIRENS!!!

Take that mainstream media!

barak obama, fauxtography, fauxtrage, slow news day

Lay the smack down, Barak!

Mac — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 04:35:47 +0000

This could be the leader of the free world.

Yeah.

Pie.

This is why I’ve been doing Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson catch–phrases after every Barak Obama sound–bite over the last year. He’s awesome on the mic, and terrible in the ring. And he likes pie.

If you smell…what Barak…is cookin‘…[cue theme music, cut to commercial]

barak obama, funny, video

Wash for Obama

Mac — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 02:20:46 +0000

Or McCain. Whatever.

What I want to know is, aren’t these backwards?

barak obama, flickr, john mccain, pictures

Bailout. All I have on the Bailout.

Mac — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 15:07:58 +0000

Not much, actually.

This does beg the question, though: which bank is the safest right now? The Bank of Folgers (what with the all–aluminum security features, impervious to squirrels) or First National of Maxwell House (what with the weatherproof security that only plastic can provide). Call me old–fashioned, but I think I’m going with Chock Full o’ Nuts.

“Chock Full of Nuts”? They should call it “Chock Full o’My Investment Portfolio”!

barak obama, congress, funny, john mccain, schadenfreude, video, youtube

Douglas Groothuis: Why I Will Vote for Obama

Mac — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 17:35:09 +0000

(Yes, this is a satire.):

1. Yes, he doesn’t share my views on abortion, but so what? After all, aborted babies go to heaven. If they grow up, they might go to hell. Abortion on demand is the best form of evangelism ever invented. So, with Obama we’d continue to get over a million babies into heaven year, and Supreme Court Justices to insure that it goes on for another generation. Obama would push for more and more federal funding for abortions, which means we would be using state money for evangelism! How cool is that?! And I’m sure the ACLU would never call him on it. Yes, I know the Bible talks about “Thou shalt not murder” and caring for “the least of these,” but let’s not get legalistic and impose our Christian morality on others.

[Via]

barak obama, iraq, marriage

Fist bumping

Mac — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 18:31:07 +0000

He was against it before he was for it! Flip–Flopper!

…no…wait…

Even Shrubya’s gettin’ some.

I swear, last week while I was contemplating doing all this stuff again, there was a wealth of material from which to draw meaningful commentary. This week — not so much. Holiday weekend, I guess.

…I wonder if it’s too late to quit again…

barak obama, fauxtrage, george bush, slow news day

McCain to ruin economy even further

Mac — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 21:45:31 +0000

Stunningly, “Americans Worry McCain Would Be Too Similar to Bush.” Yes, the concern about the “third Bush term” is so great, I had to rustle up this copycat chart:

How concerned are you that, as president, John McCain would pursue policies that are too similar to what George W. Bush has pursued — very concerned, somewhat concerned, not too concerned, or not concerned at all?

Almost half of the people responding said they were very concerned. Very concerned the steam–roller that is the 21stºcentury US market (that pretty much keeps the world afloat) is going the wrong way. They fear John McCain is going to lead us to Great Depression 2 (Electric Boogaloo). The evidence is everywhere (if you’ve somehow found some, which had been rather difficult, as of late).

If only there was some presidential candidate running on a platform of change!

In the same poll, Barak Obama is believed to be all about change — and that would be a good thing. Because the mere act of changing thing is what we need. So to conclude, greatest economy in the history of man bad, indescribably–vague change—feeling hope plan, good.

barak obama, charts, john mccain, polls

I picked a good time to start up again

Mac — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 21:27:01 +0000

Okay, first we have to give more to charities, now we have to go and serve?

Wasn’t Mike Huckabee supposed to be the one running for Preacher–in–Chief?

The next eight years may see a lot more politics / religion if this keeps up.

barak obama, fauxtrage, meta, mike huckabee

Why I am here

Mac — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 18:35:00 +0000

Two years ago, I gave politics up in a huff. While I had my reasons, when I dropped the format life got duller. A nice duller.

However, as we are all want to do, I needed the thrill. I needed the action. I needed the obsessive–compulsive disorder to make of mockery of my social life (again). I had to get back in the grift.

The problem with grifting is this: usually, you want something out of the deal. Whether to inform, persuade, or — in my case — to make all that mad blog money the kids seem to talk about all the time. You use your angle to get leverage to take the thing you want. That’s the grift.

In 2008, I need no leverage. There’s nothing I want.

Dogs, hunts, and not having them

During this latest presidential primary season, I never had a candidate. Never in the 2004 primaries — er — 2008 primaries (just feels like it’s been going on since then, I guess), did I endorse a candidate. Not even when there were 19,033 Republicans on the stage could I pick one.

It got so bad this year that I actually tried to find out something about the Democrat candidates. No, not the only ones that were going to win the thing — the ones who would actually do something different in government. Depressingly, no candidate brings much of anything other than status quo.

Well, Mike Huckabee and Ron Paul would, but they have been deemed unelectable. We all want change, as long as it’s not us that gotta do the changing.

The can–you–believe–it short version

The past couple of weeks have really changed my outlook on the current presidential elections. I’ve weighed the consequences of speaking out against what I believe to be wrong versus the safety and calm of silence. For whatever reason, I chose today to stop being silent. The reasons for breaking my silence would take longer than you’d care to read, but suffice it to say one major reason was a speech in a church.

Churches are near and dear to me, whether you understand them to be the buildings we go to meet each other, or the people who meet. The church is a body, with many parts, with many different functions. Since I value everything in a caste system starting with God, then family, then country, then other stuff, I usually think clearly.

So when somebody claims to be doing good for God, I usually think, “really?” For those of you who don’t understand the fundamental plank of Christianity — that none of us are good — American pragmatism tends to take over.

But God does not require us to do “good things.” He requires obedience. And, rightly, when God requires something for his purposes, it will benefit those whom he chooses (again for his purposes, not ours). And God is bullish on the future, things happening now may not have a relevant impact for decades — or centuries.

Long story medium: politics and my relationship to God are incredibly important to me. Seeing bad doctrine preached, or watching people lead the church astray get me motivated. That’s why I’m here.

barak obama, john mccain, mike huckabee, personal, ron paul

Here’s to open government

Mac — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 16:17:15 +0000

Kevin D. Hendricks finds out how hard it is to get answers from the McCain and Obama camps. So much for the age of openness and accountability. As he writes on Church Marketing Sucks:

Barack Obama’s campaign added me to their email newsletter without asking and has sent me eight emails in a week, none of which answered my question. On the other hand John McCain’s campaign hasn’t sent me so much as an auto–response. One candidate gives me the cold shoulder, the other won’t leave me alone. And neither one answers my question.

Granted, neither candidate has a clue what goes on with their campaign websites, but it would be nice if these two could get their respective acts strait.

barak obama, john mccain